“You run away from grief until it finds you in the middle of a sunny day” I can’t believe it’s been 15 years without you. It still doesn’t feel real. Sometimes it hits me all over again, like no time has passed at all. In some ways the years flew by. In others it’s felt… Read more: Dear Mum… (Part 15)

It’s been another year since I last wrote to you, yet it feels like just yesterday that you left us. Time has this peculiar way of both stretching endlessly and slipping through my fingers like grains of sand.

13 years, how time flies! Every year gets harder and easier at the same time. My memories of you are slowly fading, every year I forget a little more about you. I don’t know whether it’s the trauma of losing you or just my bad memory. Your little Ben turns 18 this year, you’d be… Read more: Dear Mum… (part 13)

Quick little brain vomit, been reflecting on some stuff over the past few days. Life really just likes to screw you over and makes the chemicals in your brain broken. Mine has been broken for as long as I can remember. Although, I don’t remember much from my teenage years because of this. Who knew… Read more: quick little thought dump

Every year I write a letter to my dead mum, heres 2022’s. You cant find the others because they got deleted and I cant be bothered to upload them but this one is the least depressing so 🙂

University was a struggle and a half. The pressure of doing well at University just made me not want to do any of the work so I started to fill my time doing other things whether that was drinking or watching shows. I have a lot of favourite tv shows but there’s a few that were a staple to my university life.

It was the year 1999. My mum was 19 and pregnant with her third child. On the 25th May she gave birth to me. Three days before her 20th birthday. Now 22 years later and we’re here! What a life it has been! There’s we so many ups and so many downs but I finally made… Read more: 22 years on this earth. What have I learnt?

This post is all about the 5 albums that shaped me into the person I am today!

It’s 3:30 am on a Monday. I’m sat here just staring into the void and thinking about what could have been and how my life would’ve panned out differently if my mum was still with us today. It pains me everyday she’s not here to see me accomplish milestones. She never got to see me… Read more: Grief